Featured Article - Single Parent Dating Advice:Dating
and Single Parents: Challenges Met Along the Way
Whether you’re a fifteen-year-old girl who’s out on her first date
ever with the boy next door, or a forty-year-old single dad of three
kids who’s out on his first date with a friend’s coworker three years
after a painful divorce, dating poses a lot of challenges that need to
be overcome before it can be exciting, as it is should be. However,
the challenges for single parents are undeniably greater, but this
shouldn’t deter you from testing the waters. Overcoming the challenges
is part of the fun, and the first step is identifying what they are so
that you wouldn’t be caught off-guard. For your quick reference,
here’s a list:
1.) Your children are resistant to the idea of you dating. You want to
go out on dates, but your kids want the exact opposite. The best thing
you can do is to have a heart-to-heart talk with them. Help them
realize that although you’re planning to let someone else into your
lives, they’re still and always be your top priority.
2.) You don’t have time to go on dates. Even though this may be true
for some people, for most, it is merely an excuse. You can squeeze in
time for dating if you’ve completely opened yourself up to the idea.
For one weekend, hire a trusted babysitter or ask a close friend to
look after your kids. For once in your life, make time for yourself.
3.) You don’t know where to find dating prospects. You finally decided
to try out dating, but you don’t have anyone in mind. It’s time to
join organizations and clubs that focus on your hobbies and interests.
By building your social network, you are also increasing your pool of
possible dating partners.
4.) You think that not a lot of people would want to go out with
someone who has excess baggage. You’re not very excited about dating
primarily because you think your children are perceived by many others
as an unwanted complication. Though that may be true for some people,
but for others, they just don’t care if you have kids. The one thing
they care about is whether or not you’re compatible with them.
5.) You want to protect your children. You meet a wonderful person,
but deep down you wonder if what you see is what you get. Don’t worry,
you’re not paranoid. Stories of sexual predators and physical abusers
may not happen everyday, but they do occur. To make sure that your
kids are safe from shady personalities, get to thoroughly know the
person you’re going out with before you let your kids get too close.
6.) You’re afraid to get your children emotionally involved. You’re
worried that if you get hurt, your children will be hurt, too. This is
one thing that’s hard to avoid, because as their parent, your kids can
pick up if you’re feeling miserable. However, you can help lessen the
pain in the first place by keeping your private life away from your
kids’ eyes. They may know who you’re going out with, but they don’t
have to know details about arguments and fights.
7.) You don’t want to be a serial dater. In the quest of finding
someone you truly like, you may end up going from one person to the
other if no one meets the standards you have set. Although for you
this is just part of the process of finding someone worthy, you’re
worried that you’re not setting up a good example for your children if
you’re perceived as a serial dater. Again, talking to your kids
regarding the matter helps a lot. Being discreet about your personal
life also helps, too.
These seven challenges are just a few of what you will encounter once
you start dating again. As you’ve noticed, most of them involve your
children. This should come as no surprise to you, because you know
that your kids will always be your concern. To make things easy for
you, make sure that your relationship with your children is a solid
one with a good foundation. If you’re a great parent to them, your
kids will be more supportive of you.
Source:
http://www.articlecircle.com/
About the Author
Article by Judy Porter, contributing writer for
www.parentfishing.com, a
free online dating service for single parents. Dating as a single
parent was only easy on The Brady Bunch. At ParentFishing.com, we make
it easier by bringing together singles moms with single dads who know
what it takes to date with a family. Find your partner here.
